I wanted to create a space here for connection and reflection, Words from a Doula isn’t so much about blogging about miscarriage information, although I will have some offering around that from time to time, words from a Doula is my lived experience through recurrent miscarriages, what I personally experienced and felt, by sharing these words, my words, I hope it will resonate with any mumma who’s endured this type of loss, because I know wholeheartedly we want a safe space to feel welcomed and to acknowledge what we’re feeling, without the scrutiny and judgement we’re often faced with in our grieving process.
I want you to feel supported and held wherever you so might be on your healing journey after loss, because we don’t simply just get over it and move on, we move through in our own unique way and time and that can take on a journey of itself, so I encourage you to welcome it and whatever arises, knowing you’re not alone and compassionate support is available to you, whenever you need it.
Personally, I write to heal, I write to share the deepest and most untouchable parts of myself that my spoken words can not express, I write because my words are my medicine, they help me to heal, they help others heal, I write because we’ve suffered enough in silence, all of us in many different ways, this is how I am of service, like a woven thread, it brings us together, it’s community, it’s connection, it’s healing.
I stopped writing for many years, which means the way I moved through things that arose within my life changed drastically, I was stuck in the heaviness of grief without that healing outlet to move it through and out of my body, because that’s what writing is for me, it’s therapy.
I stopped writing because knowing it is my way of healing, also meant I had to feel what I was trying so hard to burying down, the loss of our babies over many years was excruciating, it was heartbreaking and trying to put into words this type of loss and all the emotions that come with it is something you don’t just casually do, things are going to arise to be witnessed, to be felt and to be acknowledged, so denial was a safer option for me, until it wasn’t, until my body couldn’t handle any additional grief or avoidance, that’s when the healing process began, that’s when I started to write once again.
What I found during this process of deep grieving is that we all heal in different ways, we all experience joy in different ways and the gifts that live within those spaces of grieving and joy are uniquely ours to unravel when we’re ready, but connecting to things that help you heal, like writing is to me, is essential for you as an individual to discover, so healing can occur, so you can reconnect to joy and what that means to you, after loss, because as you’re probably well aware, life as you once knew has changed forever.
So I am going to continue to write and share the findings within this journey with you, so you may resonate with these experiences through loss that will hopefully help you to acknowledge and heal the parts of you that feel broken after losing your own baby or babies in many cases,
Thank you for being here, although I am sorry you are here.
Nat xx